Dear Conference committee,
As you are probably aware Boston United have been promoted into the conference North. You may not be aware but a friend of mine who is an OAP, paid full price to see the NFU play off match. I am sure this contravenes some rule in your comprehensive Boston United only rule book.
I am sorry it has come to this, but we have to keep these buggers where they belong. I am not bitter, but another raid on the club's offices may find a £3 discrepancy. I am sure this will be enough to keep them in the Unibond Evostick league.
I am not bitter, but I saw pictures of some fans cheering and laughing, surely they have not served their penance yet. Keep the buggers down I say.
I am not bitter, but I am sure there is a rule saying a team cannot have two managers. I am not bitter but surely that gives them an unfair advantage.
I am not bitter, but check the top pocket of one of them managers in the official photo, if you look closely and at a funny angle, you can just make out a brown envelope.
I am not bitter, but I see you awarded them 3 penalties last season, surely that is showing favoritism. Oops sorry that is what I am writing to them lot from the Unibond Evostick league thingie.
Anyway, I trust your fast action on this issue and hope you keep the buggers down.
Yours in anticipation Paul from Narking X X X X
